Welcome to Part 2 of our mini-series on Social Fitness where we will be:

1. Finding out how to assess our current Social Fitness,
2. Learning tips for improving our Social Fitness level and
3. Taking a peek into connections and community in action at Boundless Life.

(If you missed Part 1 - which explained what Social Fitness is and why it’s so important to our health? No worries! You can catch up here.)

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Assessing your Social Fitness level 

Before we start limbering up to improve our Social Fitness, let’s understand what our current level is. 

It’s important to stress that the ideal social life will look different for different people. For example, someone who identifies as an introvert might have very different perceptions and expectations of this when compared to an extrovert. 

When assessing your own Social Fitness it is important to focus on whether or not the connections you are making are meeting your personal needs. 

Here are some pointers to get you started: 

✅ Connections Count 

Think about the number of different relationships you have. Add to this any regular interpersonal connections you have and the frequency that these occur. From your most significant relationships with family right down to your weekly chat with your favourite barista - all these connections add up to a healthier Social Fitness level. 

✅ Interconnectedness 

Next, consider how interconnected the people within your social network are. For example, do many of you know each other through work? Through your children’s school? Through a volunteer group. 

When we consider the factors that contribute to the increased health and longevity of residents of the world’s 'blue zones, what do we find? Spending regular amounts of time with interconnected groups of people (with a common purpose, beliefs, motivations etc.) greatly boosted our emotional well-being. 

✅ Quality vs. Quantity! 

Consider your list again. Who can you lean on - and who leans on you - when times get tough or you need a little extra help? (As you have probably realised over time, those who rely upon you can’t always be relied upon unfortunately.) Which of your relationships flow easily with little or no friction? Who can you always communicate with easily and freely? At the other end of the spectrum, with whom do you find communication challenging? 

Assessment complete! You’ve taken an inventory of all of your relationships and considered where improvements can be made. Are you putting in the effort needed to keep these ties strong? Are they? Making a conscious assessment of your Social Fitness - and making any necessary adjustments to improve it - can even add years to your life as we discussed in Part 1. Now we’ve taken stock of our current connections, let’s move on to improving them.

‍Time to warm up, stretch and flex our Social Fitness 

🎽 Join a regular group or club 

Whether this is short, medium or long-term. By participating in such groups you benefit from what’s called the ‘mere exposure effect’. This is our natural tendency to connect with and like people who are familiar to us. Strangers are just friends you haven’t made yet! Yes, it’s probably going to feel a bit awkward and forced to begin with but stick with it to break through to the ‘comfortable’ stage. And remember, you’re all in the same boat with the same nervousness to begin with. 

🎽 Follow routines

If you follow the same routines you are likely to begin to see and interact with the people who are doing the same. Whether this is going to the gym or the coffee shop at the same time each week, walking your dog along the same route or even visiting the supermarket at a regular time. These patterns create micro-opportunities to begin to form casual acquaintances. From here, you can build up to friendship OR just reap the benefits from these casual interactions. Remember, all connections (small to significant) contribute towards our Social Fitness level! 

“It’s not about the amount of contact we have with people, it’s much more about the quality of that contact and that sense of belonging that we derive from it. There are ways we can stay connected and feel that sense of belonging without having it take up a huge amount of our time.”

Tegan Cruwys, Associate Professor and clinical psychologist at the Australian National University. 

🎽 Technology can help…but also hinder.

Our Social Media platforms can help us connect with people and maintain existing relationships (especially long- distance ones) BUT if used as a substitute for real-life interactions they can increase feelings of loneliness which, in turn, can be very detrimental to our emotional well-being. 

Passive consumption (so-called ‘Doom Scrolling’) can trick our minds into believing we have fulfilled our need for social connection when, in fact, we’ve probably done more harm than good ☹️

🎽 It’s cool to be kind. 

Fans of the TV show ‘Friends’ might remember the episode where Phoebe sets out to prove that you can carry out a truly altruistic act. I’m not sure she’s entirely successful with this, but does it matter? 

Organising, or just participating in, events that bring people together with the aim of improving the circumstances of a few will still have a positive impact on the many. 

These kinds of events or simple get-togethers are especially important for people who might otherwise face barriers to maintaining social connections - for example, the elderly, the less abled and those experiencing poverty. By engaging in small acts to help increase and maintain connectivity, we could also end up helping people who might need more help than we do. And it’s OK to bask guilt-free in the ‘warm and fuzzies’ that result. 

🎽 Re-connecting 

One of the simplest ways to grow your network is through connection with old friends. Is there someone you have fond memories of who you felt you had a symbiotic relationship with - where you both thrived as a result of your relationship? Maybe you have simply drifted apart over time? Reach out to them and begin to establish that link. There’s a very good chance they miss you too! 

These are just a few pointers to get you pondering your Social Fitness level and how you can make even minor tweaks to boost it and the positives this delivers.

‍Boost your Social Fitness with Boundless! 

Community is at the very heart of Boundless living and, as our families often tell us, one of the biggest benefits of the experience. Here are just a few real examples we have witnessed of Social Fitness - and its benefits - in action:

💓 Joining as strangers, leaving as lifelong friends. So many wonderful friendships have been forged during our cohorts. And these don’t end when the cohort does! Many families have reconnected all over the world and some have coordinated to reunite and enjoy multiple cohorts together. 

For more on this: Read our special Friendship Blog.

💓 Building on those micro-connections - even with language barriers! Our families are immersed in the local community of their chosen location. Regular trips to the same bakery; interacting with our Extracurricular Activity providers when collecting the children; saying ‘Bom Dia ’, ‘Ciao’, ‘Kalimera’ or ‘Om Swastyastu’ to your local neighbours - all of these small moments add up to growing connections over time. 

Our young Explorers are great at this - perhaps because they don’t have the same hang-ups we adults have accumulated. You will often find them out and about with the Education Centre team practising their language and maths skills simultaneously whilst ordering fruit and vegetables at the local grocery store. 

💓 Spreading kindness. Our families have taken part in all kinds of Give Back activities involving the local communities. These have included multiple beach clean-ups, a Scavenger Hunt to raise money for less fortunate children in Syros and supporting a Cat Rescue Centre. Our Explorers in Sintra helped to break down barriers to social connection by visiting and performing songs for an elderly residents’ home - a hugely beneficial undertaking for all involved. 

💓 An instant network of support. The camaraderie between families is beautiful to see. At times when it ‘really does take a village’ it is there! Whether it’s stepping in to collect someone’s children because they’ve got stuck on a work call,  bringing noodle soup to help someone feeling under the weather, or one solo-travelling mum teaming up with another, these communities ALWAYS step up. So many families have commented that they intend to nurture such behaviour when they return home because they have truly witnessed the power of community. 

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If you want to experience the power of our communities for yourself, let’s connect!